I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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