got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
operation have a gay friend backfired
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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