Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize