My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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