who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
40s are totally the cure
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
