would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
