he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
