So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
