why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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