You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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