what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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