She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize
