we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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