We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
