dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I think your dad took our porno
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize