I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
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