I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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