He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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