Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
