Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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