Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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