I hate your face
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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