Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Princesses don't give blow jobs
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize