You're so nebulous sometimes
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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