Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
