Sponge bath it is.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
