I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
