I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
