Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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