so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
