IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
