How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Found the puke drawer
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
