The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
