Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
