After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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