Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
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