already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
