Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Randomize
