That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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