I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
worst night to have a conscience
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
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