I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Randomize
