I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
