Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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