Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(972): View more from Texas

90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina

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(702): View more from Nevada

Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad

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(214): View more from Texas

yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning

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(703): View more from Virginia

Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy

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(519): View more from Ontario

Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet

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(907): View more from Alaska

Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.

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(562): View more from California

The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am

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