At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize