When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
