My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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