also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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