He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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