Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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